Do you ever get that overwhelming feeling like you shouldn't have thrown away something that you thought would never matter to you again?

Or you have had enough old, so time to renew...time once again to start over. New years, new lives, new friends, new things.

But what about all of the old things...
Your first word?
What about that first bike?
The first juicy apple you tried?
That first new friend in preschool that knew everything about you?
First Christmas at home...
First love, first crushing disappointment...
Your first day of high school?
That first best friend for life?
First dance, first kiss?

What about that first betrayal? What about the last?

How can it be that our first childhood is never as lovely as we think our first child's is?

Are we expecting too much from the old? Are we so old that everything should be so new?

I regret, and then I change my mind and I don't. I miss old friends. I miss my mother. I miss being young and being in the moment. My sacrifices are like any other. There's nothing particularly strange to me about feeling sorry. For what you say? Why, for losing those things...losing the "back thens," the past. Regretting some of the things I've said...

Things I've done.
A shower is just not as efficient as bearing down in this feeling, washing it from my mind. Why regret? ...I miss things more than I regret. I dunno. Here's my apology. My apology to my life I guess.

I'm happy, to be honest, I just wish I didn't remember the other side of the story.

The side that I have to call now, "The old me..."